While in Sibu, Malaysia I had the opportunity to explore the town center/quad which was very close to my guest house. I was able to explore, get my own meals, and even find a place to get wireless internet and cheap mochas. On my final night when my host asked if she could drop me off a few blocks from my guest house because of traffic and one way streets and because she had a meeting, I of course said yes.
Not only was it dark but it was also busy. There was a cultural fair going on and there were wall to wall people and distractions of every shape and color. I quickly got disoriented and had no clue how to get to my home. As the fear and worry started to rise up in me and I continued to try to get home by my own knowledge, the panic started to come upon me. Then the realization hit: my guest house was right next to a Methodist church- and all Malaysian Methodist Churches have a cross on the steeple. As I searched the sky for the cross I knew was there, I felt comfort and peace. I quickly found my way “home” through the beacon of the cross.
Now I reflect on that story as I sit in Thailand, notably a place of great spiritual oppression and darkness. For those of you who do not believe this- CS Lewis said that the greatest accomplishment Satan ever did was convince us that he did not exist. Over and over again I am hearing stories of spiritual darkness in this beautiful yet broken land. I confess in this, a moment of transparency, that I have fallen prey to this as well.
My sister joined me in Thailand for the last leg of my journey. We have spent much needed time catching up, laughing, and playing together. It was not until last night that I realized ashamedly that I had let my time with God completely suffer in my time in Thailand. I realized that I have been completely spoiled traveling alone as well as living alone in the states. As life gets more complicated I must recall these moments both in Malaysia and Thailand. In the darkness of my life, physical as well as spiritual I need to look to the cross. I need to look towards Jesus for my direction. And when I have not, I am not walking as a Child of the light. The following verses in Ephesians continues “for the fruit of the light consists in all goodness, righteousness and truth…” –how can I teach the Truth if I am not in it daily.
As I am humbled by this realization and yet again reminded of the need to be brought to my knees day after day, I am praying for Thailand. I ask that you join me in this adventure of prayer. I can tell you of many organizations
and workers who would covet your prayers as they work to bring the kingdom of God a little closer in this beautiful but dark nation, to be the light representing the Light.
love and God Bless,
beth
and workers who would covet your prayers as they work to bring the 
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